Monday, May 28, 2012

Grace is Almost Here...

I think one of the reasons I haven't been blogging so much about this is that I've been trying hard not to overthink it.  But on May 30th, Grace will be in my arms.  Noah, Chloe and Grace, three kids that God has entrusted to Matt and myself to raise.  Quite honestly, it can be pretty daunting to think about.  I'm far from perfect as a mother of when you toss an extra kid in the mix...I just have no idea what to expect.  And then I'm reminded that raising these kids is God's plan for me.  This is my ministry.  My life.  And He will equip Matt and me to do it.  And we will mess up.  It may not be "okay" all the time, but we'll be forgiven and by His grace, we'll learn.  By His grace, we will raise these sweet little creations to know and love their Savior.


Grace.  She certainly is a gift from every way.  We found out back in March that I have placenta accreta.  The specialist in Denver said it was a milder case and thought we'd probably be fine to deliver here in Gillette.  My doctor here isn't worried about the surgery, she's worried about not having good enough access to blood supplies in case I do have excessive blood loss during the surgery.  Because of that, we'll be delivering in Denver (per the recommendation of my Dr here).  I guess it sounds a little scary, but the danger that is caused by this type of complication is much, much more severe when it's discovered during delivery.  The fact that this is known, and that the doctor and hospital will be well prepared for it is good.  Aside from the risk of blood loss, I do also have the risk of ending up with a hysterectomy.  The doctor thinks that it's not a definite, so I'm praying that it is not necessary.  Aside from the hormonal roller-coaster that would send me on, it would also extend my recovery period (and I'll have 3 littles at home).  Please pray that the "hyst" as the dr so lovingly called it, is not necessary.  Either way, we are done.  The risk of similar and possibly worse complications with another pregnancy is high...and just not worth it.  Matt and I are fine with this (yes, really), but again, pray against the hysterectomy...because I may not be as fine with it if I'm on that hormonal roller coaster. 

So we leave tomorrow for Denver.  We're planning on leaving after lunch, so we aren't rushed.  Okay, yes.  So I have plenty of time for Target, Old Navy and Chic-fil-a.  Give a girl a break, I've gone through almost this entire pregnancy without my worldly preggo-comforts.  I can practically taste the milkshake now...
Sorry, easily distracted over here.
We'll be staying at a hotel pretty close to the hospital (St. Luke's Presbyterian) so that we can get there easily on Wed morning.  I'll have an amniosentisis at 8am to make sure Grace's lungs are fully matured.  Assuming they are, the c-section is scheduled for 10am.   That's mountain time people, so know that the earliest Matt would get anything posted or texted will probably be closer to 1pm east coast time.  People keep asking what the plan is if the amnio doesn't give us the results we need.  Ummm, that's not happening.  My original due date was 10 days earlier, so while I'll technically be at 37.5 weeks, I consider myself more like somewhere between 37.5 and 39 weeks.  And if you've seen my belly lately, you know this girl has got to be ready to come out. 
The earliest we'd leave Denver will be Friday, but it will just depend on what ends up happening during surgery and how I'm recovering.  I really want to get home as quickly as possible, so I'm praying that we can leave no later than Saturday.

Noah and Chloe will be staying here at the house with Matt's parents.  They arrived on Sunday and ever since they've gotten here Noah keeps telling me I need to hurry up and go get Gracie out.  I'm not sure if he's more excited to meet Grace, or to have the undivided attention of his Mimi and Papa.  Probably a little of both.  I'm not at all worried about him while we're gone, but I am a little anxious about leaving Chloe.  I'm so glad she gets to be here at our house, with Noah and with her Mimi and Papa...but this will be her first night away from me.  Yes, I know that's ridiculous, but it's just the way it is, so that's another reason I really hope to get back from Denver as soon as possible.  I have to say that I'm incredibly spoiled when it comes to my in-laws.  They're pretty amazing and I'm just so glad that they could be here for N & C and to help out afterwards for a few days.

Thank you so much friends for praying for me and my family through this.  We're grateful for every prayer and kind word and trust our loving God that we're in His hands. 

And now I need to be getting ready for bed...but I think I need a snack first. FOUR!!

Noah turned 4 on April 4th.  In some ways it's hard to believe that so much time has passed since he was a sweet little baby.  But he also says things that seem so grown up sometimes it almost seems like he should really be 5.  He's a kid now...not a baby, not a toddler, a KID.  (Elisa - You warned me this would happen when he turned 3...and you were right...and it's c.r.a.z.y.)  And a pretty darn awesome kid at that.

Noah at 2 weeks old
He requested a dinosaur cake (thank goodness since I had the pan) and picked the colors himself.  The purple part was actually him being sweet to Chloe...since that's her favorite color (seriously, he is THE best big brother EVER). 
Noah was sad that his Virginia friends and family couldn't come to his party.  But, I'm so glad that by the time his birthday rolled around he felt like he had friends here.  He is still so shy when he first meets people, and gets overwhelmed in situations with a lot of people, so it was a sort of slow process at first.  When we first moved I think this was the hardest thing for him and for me.  But praise God for all his little friends (and for their mommies that are my friends)!
Noah has gotten into superheroes of late.  Very into superheroes.  He talks about them and pretends that he's a superhero often.  Right now The Hulk is his favorite, "because he's the strongest."  He also decided that since he's 4, and a "big kid" he needs to learn to write.  It amazes me...he'll sit at the table for over an hour working on writing letters.  He'll make me grocery lists and make birthday cards for his friends (regardless of when their birthday is).  He can't really write words yet, so he just writes a bunch of letters and tells me what they say.  His patience and persistence really impresses me.  He has also started drawing more intentional pictures.  Drawing people, superheroes (of course), animals, etc.  He has pretty much stopped taking naps altogether, so he has lots of quiet big boy time that he uses to practice all his new big boy skills.  He frequently asks me if whatever he is working on at the time is something that Luke and Micah (his older cousins) can do. He does get frustrated with himself if he can't do something the way he wants to right away (he gets that from Matt).  He just expects so much of himself. He has gotten much better at being patient and has realized that practicing is a necessity (thank goodness since at first he would start crying if his "A" didn't look just like mine...).  I just love watching him grow up and learn.  

Noah makes me smile and laugh a thousand times a day.  He is such a gift and I'm so grateful for the loving God that created him and blessed me so much by letting me be his mom.  My heart is full. 

Back to Old Habits...

Okay, so I can hardly believe that it's been almost 3 months since my last blog post.  So much has I'll make this a quick review...

Trip to Denver went well, but we will end up delivering Grace there.  I have Placenta Accreta, which isn't nearly as bad as it could have been...but worse than we had hoped for.  Ultimately, we're SO thankful that we know about it ahead of time and could plan around it.  God has provided so well for us through this journey - we have nothing to complain or worry about.  More on this later...

Noah turned 4 on April 4th.  This is INSANE and I still haven't wrapped my mind around it.  I have a 4 year old?!?  He's completely wonderful, sweet, and so smart...I really don't think I could love this kid more or be more proud of the little man he is.  Also more on this later (he definitely deserves his own post!)

My dad was our first visitor!!  He arrived on Noah's birthday and left on Easter Sunday.  We had a great visit and the kids are already looking forward to the next time he comes. 

Since Easter I've been trying to get ready for Grace's arrival.  We did some house rearranging and painted her room.  Basically, if you're wondering why I haven't been blogging, it's because I've been nesting.  Also napping a lot.  hehe:) 

We've been here in Wyoming for over 6 months now...which is so crazy to think about.  It has become our new normal.  There are of course some things we dislike (distance from family, the INSANE wind, etc...), but there's much more that we do like.  I'm so grateful for the courage that Matt had to move us across the country.  God provided an opportunity, and he didn't hesitate to take it...and we have been so incredibly blessed since we moved here.